oh god i have chills don’t post things like this
why would you do something like this?
before you have sex with me you have to earn it
take these two potatoes and this goat and bring them to the river valley where you will meet an old gypsy named madam zeroni. carry madam zeroni back up the mountain on your back and allow her to drink from the stream while you sing for her. she will give you a necklace of beads. return them to me to complete the quest.
Opening Sequence of Nickelodeon’s Doug (1991-1994)
“My poor baby” I whisper tenderly to 30+ year old man on a tv show
“My poor baby” I whisper tenderly to 1 000 000 000+ year old angel on a tv show
“My poor baby” I whisper tenderly to 900+ year old alien on a tv show.
“My poor baby” I whisper tenderly to 1000+ year old Norse God in a movie.
“oh my god I’m never having one of those” I whisper tenderly to a baby